A lost soul in Christmas

The sound of rock music echoes, and voices of people shouting fervently for their game can be heard the whole time, as I sit alone in this CC, becoming one of the lost souls in Christmas.

They are the people who cannot find their way in the mass of people, that had failed to find the term myself among the midst of poeple they know. They indulged in the world of digital, a world of internet , perhaps the most unreliable thing in this world. Yet these are the best thing that he or she could have grasped. In the wirtual world, he has a different identity, a different view, a different thing to do, that could possibly throw him out of sadness of reality.

Especially in this Christmas, when loves and care fills the air, there seems to be a group of people that is unable to love someone, or not loved and cared. There seems to have people that fails of distinguish Christmas with another day. To them, christmas is just another one of his hundred excuse to leave the house, or the cage of reality perhaps for someone, and indulge themselves in these seeming unreliable digital world.

We are the ones who perhaps who choose to ignore, choose not to acknowledge the presence of Him. Even though the heat of love of him is radiant, it coulf never reach the cold's space of them. The radiant seems to be to hot, or perhaps too surplus, for a cool heart resides in a person.

We are The Lost Soul of Christmas. We're the ones who Santa would never give a visit to.

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Today, I had the worst Christmas ever...

Yesterday, there's a ex-schoolmate gathering. I half-hearted attended the gathering. The skepticism within me told me that it's going to be another dull gathering for me. Or perhaps, I scared to go there.

To see my own mistake, my silly past, seeing the me who has been once helpless before.

I reached the gathering, and greeted by one of those stupid nicknames I "honorly" earned during my school years. Before this, I could have turned into a tall face, or refuted what I say. However, I smirked at them, and sat down quietly, disappointingly telling myself " They still haven't changed. do they."

During the whole gathering, I fall to silence, as I listened to their experiences, and in the end, loaded by crap, ranging from " I've just done a concert in Tokyo to Do you want to lost ur virginity tonight,"

Utter nonsense.

In the next one hour, I excused myself to toilet, and then run ro the nearest CC to have a game.

SAm I being too sensitive after two years, or am I becoming more pesimism within these two years, I couldn't have known.

Another bored and "miserable" Christmas Eve.
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Christmas!

Wake up la, you have to work at 7a.m., so let's get working.

Having a chicken chop for lunch, asked the co-worker of mine to prepare a turkey to me, but he replied, there's a bunch of lightfire there if you wanted to smoke.

Laughed at his reply (huo ji (turkey) and the lighter (da huo ji) sounds the same.

And today friends called me to have a nadminton game in a resort, in the end, my trousers broke into half, and my two-years spectacle broken.

And when I reached home, an electronic breakout happened just when I arrived home.

And now, I am typing on a computer, after mom's failed attempt to let me stay at home.

Tonight, do you see a cart with reindeer pass through the night of Xmas, I don't, cuz Santa never show himself to the mischevious kid.

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Happy Christmas to all of you, and remember, this is perhaps ur last christmas in Malaysia, or in your own state.

And remember to cherish those one you love, and learn to love in this Christmas.

Xmas is a time when you learn to bless , love giving and receiving bless from everyone, though business has commercialized Xmas into something comercial, but please remember, the true meaning of Christmas, a time of love-care and sharing. Be aware of the people throughout the world who have suffered around as you enjoyed another one of ur enjoyable christmas with friends.

Give a ten second of prayer to those lost of people in Thailand, that struggled for democracy, to those that have died under the cruel attacks of Mumbais, the Africans that have died from our splendid spending, and others that might be writhing for pain as you laughed with join in this christmas.

Me?

I still haave to worry my spec